Birthdays & Frontotemporal Dementia

 

My daughter Miranda happened to snap an image of her Dad & I that stunned me. He looks just like Randy before dementia. His eyes were both looking at the camera. I couldn't believe it. And you know what? I needed it. I needed a glimpse at what he looked like. He's still in there. And I know he still knows me.

Birthdays are hard. Another year wondering how his dementia is going to progress. What is the next decline going to look like. Was this his last birthday? As much as I want him to be with Jesus, I panic with every decline. But I was so thankful he was having a good day when our daughter and her family came to celebrate his 71st birthday. He would just stare at her, his grandchildren, his son-in-law. Like he knew them. What a gift. To see him so aware, so present. God is so good to give us sweet memories to remember.

Even though I am his caregiver, his advocate, he is still my husband and the love of my life. He still makes my heart skip a beat when I see him, when he hugs me, pats my bottom, when we touch noses. 

I will leave you with a powerful truth from Randy's book A Believer's Journey.

"If I have no firm conviction, then every trial that I encounter in my life becomes a test of God's goodness, rather than what it is ~ an opportunity to live by faith in Christ. This firm conviction keeps me dependent on Him rather than myself. Otherwise I will start trying to run my own life and I do not have the ability to do that. I will quit and give up on the journey, and then I will miss the joy of having persevered and endured, and stand at the end of all things knowing I finished well and held steadfast in my faith."

Randy Thompson ~ A Believer's Journey