Sunday, February 08, 2015

The Joys of Dementia

One of the characteristics of frontotemporal dementia is uncharacteristic behavior. One in particular impacts appearance and personal hygiene. It never, ever occurs to my husband Randy that he should brush his teeth, shave, take a shower, cut his nails or groom himself. Things that he did without thinking. SO, he has not shaven or gotten a haircut in several months. I have not let it bother me too much, because he truly wants to do those things. He. just. can't. He will let me start a haircut and then immediately tell me he needs to go read. And no amount of bribing works. A QT Coke? A DQ blizzard? Nothing. So whenever I am given even a minute, I go really fast and make sure I'm cutting symmetrical, so when he is done, it's not too lopsided.

Well, the other day I was determined to give him a complete haircut and while he means to let me, I knew I had to come prepared with major distractions. Meaning LOTS of questions and LOTS of talking. So we began and I'm seriously cutting like a madwoman and talking like a lunatic... and proceeded to cut my knuckle. (just so you know I was a professional beautician before I moved to Phoenix) Needless to say, it started bleeding. But that was not going to deter me. I was on a mission! Yes, there was blood dripping onto his head, neck and forehead, but I kept yapping and he kept answering my questions. It was not my finest hour haircut, but by golly I did it! And when he had had enough, he proceeded to tell me he had to go read... and then I proceeded to tell him he had to go take a shower because their was blood all over him. So I showed him my bloody knuckle and he looked in the mirror and we laughed and laughed. Oh the joys of dementia! And yes, there are so many of those moments that I want to remember, that make me smile, that bring me joy.

Now on to the beard debacle. Ha! I will keep you posted.

Randy & Koda at Kiwanas Park in Tempe this morning