July Milestones

 July brings to mind a few bittersweet milestones.

My husband was placed in a memory care facility 8 years ago. (2018)

My husband's book A Believer's Journey was published 2 years ago. (2024)

My husband's brand new website was launched 1 year ago. (2025)

Randy was diagnosed with Frontotemporal dementia (FTD) in 2014, although I sensed that he was not himself as early as 2010. Thank God he wrote a book just before he was diagnosed. And so thankful his legacy lives on through his book, his music and website.

Randythompson.org 

Randy's website is loaded with his music info, sample songs, lyrics to 90+ songs off his 8 CDs, his book info and so much more. I recently lowered the price of his book on Amazon.

A Believer's Journey

Randy has been on Hospice for 2 1/2 years and was recently discharged. Medicare is really cracking down and now requiring they be actively dying to be on Hospice. That was a huge blow. I feared the lack of extra care. But so thankful palliative care is on board.

Randy is now in a wheelchair. I can't begin to tell you how hard that has been for me. Walking was his favorite thing to do. In fact his only thing. He rarely participated in activities. He rarely interacted with others before he stopped talking in 2020. But he walked. All. Day. 

Randy is still very healthy. He would have lived a very long life if not for dementia. He has actually outlived the 2-8 years life expectancy after symptom onset. At 72, Randy is now in his 16th year. Although I would miss him terribly, I want him to be with Jesus so bad. But only He knows the number of Randy's days. I am just so thankful he is peaceful, and not suffering. 

I wish I could say the same. I have struggled to fully trust God these past 16 years. I actually did real well the first several years. But this long goodbye is taking a toll on my mental health. My friend recently pointed out that I have been in a very long trial. I was stunned, as I've always thought of a trial as being short-lived... not a 16 year trial.

"Trials are difficult life circumstances, tests of faith, and periods of suffering designed by God to build spiritual maturity, character, and endurance." 

As the years have gone by, I have grown so weary and tired... and sadly I've failed the testing of my faith. I want the trial to be over. But then there would be others. So I lay in bed every morning and cry out to God for peace, strength and total dependency on Him.

Do not fear the road ahead, for God walks with you, His hand will guide you, and his grace will sustain you through every trial.  Deuteronomy 31:6

 In the midst of it all, I have so many blessings!

• my caregiver support group ~ Makers of Care
• pickleball with new friends
• phone calls with my siblings
• my dear elderly clients ages 89 and 100
• Randy's wonderful caregivers
• zoom calls w/ dear high school friends
• 2001 TV show- Doc on Tubi- so good!
• my new FTD friend from Minneapolis
• and my amazing grandkids

               Nathan +  Emolyn + Cora + Will + Theo + Hazel + Elsie + Jonah + Mimi

Joy in the Unknowns

 

So thankful I captured this photo of Randy on Mar. 28th, 2024 ~ 2 years ago today.

Randy's frontotemporal dementia journey has progressed very slowly... symptoms starting in 2010, 16 years ago. 

When I found this photo I could see how much he has declined in the past two years.

I recently noticed that while a lot of the residents have an angry/sad resting face, Randy doesn't. He has a peaceful resting face. I am so thankful for that. Because even though Randy can no longer express himself verbally or facially, Christ in Randy's heart is clearly evident because of God's love for Randy and Randy's love for God.

God is love and anyone who lives in love, lives in God, and God lives in him. 

I John 4:16

 I recently read this ~

Don't forget to picture the best case scenario, not the worst case scenario.

That's me ~ dwelling on the unknown ~ Randy's passing, my future, finances, maintaining my home, the day-to-day decisions that paralyze me. 

But joy in the unknowns of life can be found by embracing uncertainty as an opportunity for me to grow in my dependency on God as my rock, my protector. 

The best case scenario? Fully trusting God, His sovereignty, peace, joy in the journey, contentment, the courage to travel, be adventuresome, road trips alone with Jesus riding shotgun, supporting women on their dementia journeys, creating in my sewing room, being grateful and accepting of all that I have been given.  

So thank you God ~ for Randy, his caregivers, his awareness of who I am, the memories we share, my family & friends, my health, my home, 

my caregiver support group (Makers of Care) and...

Theo, my 3 year old grandson says I'm his best friend! Oh how I love that curly-haired little boy! I am so blessed! 

My dear friend Helen is 100!

 I've been caring for a precious Christian woman for the past several years at an Independent Living facility. And she has become one of my dearest friends. Well…

Helen turns 100 years old on March 12th! 

Helen turns 100 3 weeks after my Dad would have turned 100. And 5 weeks before Queen Elizabeth would have turned 100. Yes, 1926 was a very good year. 

The address book Helen is holding in the photo was given to her when she was 18 years old in 1944! That book is 82 years old and still in great condition and filled with addresses!

She still lives alone, is doing quite well and so proud of her Danish heritage. Helen completed nurses training after HS graduation, through the Cadet Nurse Corp in Sioux Falls, SD.

Every week we have "church" in the apartment she has lived for the past 25 years. (after her husband passed) We sing hymns from a huge book of "101 Lutheran Hymns". And she knows every single word to every single hymn. Often times I will cry while singing my favorite hymns ~ recalling sweet memories while growing up attending a Lutheran church in Wisconsin.

I Need Thee Every Hour

Onward Christian Soldier

Beautiful Savior

Blessed Assurance

What A Friend We Have In Jesus

I also want you to know that Helen has been faithfully praying for me for all these years. She will often ask about Randy and prays for him too. She loves when I show her weekly photos of my granddaughter Hazel, because she had a sister named Hazel. Helen was the youngest of 9 kids growing up in South Dakota. Her brother recently passed at 106. I tease her that she's still a spring chicken at only 100 years old!

I recently took a fall while on a morning walk. For a split second I thought 'I need to call my Mom!' But she's been gone for 9 years. So I assessed my bruised bones, bandaged my wounds, and went to work. But when I limped through the front door, Helen could see I was a mess. She was so concerned and caring... like my Mom would have been. God was so good to give me Helen that day.

Today I will come bearing gifts ~ balloons, milk chocolate bars and Danish Aebleskivers (pancake balls)! Danish Kringles and Aebleskivers from Trader Joes are the best! And Helen's favorite's!

I am so blessed to have Helen in my life. Happy 100th Birthday!